Learning to Let Go of What Other People Say About Me | Wally from The Wally Show

Week 2: Lies We Believe

Combatting the lie: I am defined by what people say about me.

Words can hurt and after years of sharing his life on the radio, Wally from The Wally Show has been forced to deal with many of them. You won’t believe the comments people have sent into the show, but you’ll be refreshed and surprised by his honesty about how he has handled them over the years. His insight into knowing your true identity in spite of what other people say will give you a new perspective and ground you in who you really are!

 

Wally says, “The key for me in this kind of scenario was learning grace. I didn’t have that for a lot of years. For me it was like, “Ok, I need to learn how to read between these lines and see why that person is hurting. And in this case, they might have their own identity messed up and they’re bringing their baggage here and putting it on me. Learning to have grace for that and look beyond that hurt helped me also change who I was and altered my identity. Now I wasn’t just this angry radio guy. I was someone who had compassion for someone who wasn’t having compassion for me…

The truth I have to come back to is that I’m flawed. That sounds like a negative, but it actually lets me understand that I have to look at myself, too, and say, “Did I make a mistake here?” Sometimes people do hit me with things and they might be right. It’s been good for me in that sense – honestly assessing myself and knowing who you truly are. 

When someone comes at you, you go back to the truth in the Bible. They say say if you want to learn something, teach it. And the things that I tell people everyday: You are fearfully and wonderfully made. There’s a God of the universe that created you and intimately knows you. I want people to understand this so they know God is love and that they’re loved by God! I have to remind myself of that, too, because there are some days where I definitely don’t feel that.”

In week 2 of the World’s Biggest Small Group: Identity, we’re combatting the lies we so often believe and learning to replace them with truth. Here’s a verse to think on this week as we learn:

10 The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life.

(John 10:10 New Living Translation)

Don’t miss out! This is just one day in a 15 day series on Identity. You can subscribe and get each day in your inbox below.

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    Lori Hollinger
    Lori Hollinger
    October 17, 2018 10:43 am

    I have no idea why “Christians” feel the need to be so mean to each other. Personally I think for some reason they feel the right to correct others, which could be pride or arrogance. I realize we are ALL a work in progress and God won’t give up until He’s done. I’m sorry someone said those terrible things to you. They most likely have a serious issue within themselves to not value your life. If you disagree with a person, talk about that, talk about the issue, something good will most likely come out of it. It is not… Read more »

    Rebecca (Rebie) Ikes
    Reply to  Lori Hollinger
    October 19, 2018 10:09 am

    Well said, Lori. Talk to that person and see what’s really happening! Try to find better understanding. Easier said than done (haha) but so true. I know a lot of Christians are hurting or are just very hard on themselves because they want to be “good enough.” Sometimes when I’m the hardest on myself, that’s when I’m the hardest on others, too. Some of these comments might be extreme versions of that. Regardless, I like that Wally brought up that phrase, “Hurt people hurt people.” It’s true. When we’re in pain, sometimes we lash out. It’s disappointing, but reminds me… Read more »

    Debbie Swanson
    Debbie Swanson
    October 17, 2018 5:47 am

    Wally, you are an imperfect human being – just like all of us. However, you are fearfully and wonderfully made and God loves you with an all encompassing, endless love! The comments that people throw at you that are mean and hateful – they are from the pit of hell, as Satan and his minions are the great deceivers. You just have to remember that the closer you come to doing God’s work and making an impact (as you CERTAINLY do), you’re going to rile the dark realms of hell. Keep on pressing forward, my friend. You are loved, and… Read more »

    Rebecca (Rebie) Ikes
    Reply to  Debbie Swanson
    October 19, 2018 10:13 am

    Loving this encouragement ❤️

    Martha
    Martha
    October 17, 2018 7:03 am

    Wally, the lesson you learned about grace thru this awful experience is spot on. It’s so easy for anyone to make a off the cuff judgment about someone, but to be so ugly shows how much that person is hurting and spewing their pain to others as a defensive mechanism. Yes, it hurts to hear comments like “no one likes you and you should kill yourself” but we need to turn it around and pray for that person and show them the love they are missing.

    Rebecca (Rebie) Ikes
    Reply to  Martha
    October 19, 2018 10:13 am

    SO true. Easier said than done, but that’s why we rely on God’s strength and renew our mind with truth. That’s where it all comes from! Thanks for your words of wisdom, Martha!

    Anna
    Anna
    October 17, 2018 8:16 am

    Wally, you have brought so much joy into peoples lives with your show and I regularly recommend the podcast to my friends. I couldn’t help but laugh a little at this video not because of the mean things people have said to you or the way you’ve had to grow and overcome mean words but because this was the first time I got to hear your bracelets jingling! It brought a smile to my face. Thank you!

    Rebecca (Rebie) Ikes
    Reply to  Anna
    October 19, 2018 10:11 am

    haha So true!! I really admire the way he has learned to deal with all of this. He’s a great guy.

    Karli
    Karli
    October 17, 2018 8:18 am

    Wally your words are of great encouragement to me, there is a certain family member in my life who has hurt me with their horrible lieing words, and not just hurt me but everyone in our family, their abusive words still enter my mind sometimes and I feel great sadness. I know this person is hurting, but it’s very difficult to separate yourself from what they say, especially when it’s in your own family. Learning from God’s grace and love has helped me, but it’s a continual battle of my mind, I’ve come to the point where I have to… Read more »

    Rebecca (Rebie) Ikes
    Reply to  Karli
    October 19, 2018 10:11 am

    I admire your resolve and your journey to leaning on grace! And praying for this person that hurt you. I’m so sorry you had to go through that. It sounds like God is working in you, though, and I’m so glad to hear that. Keep walking with him! <3

    Doris Ripczinski
    Doris Ripczinski
    October 17, 2018 8:10 am

    Loved this episode . Thank you. As I listened, one word kept popping out, Wisdom. Thank You Father, that you give it freely as we ask.

    Rebecca (Rebie) Ikes
    Reply to  Doris Ripczinski
    October 19, 2018 10:12 am

    Yes yes yes!! I love in James 1 it talks about how God will generously give wisdom to everyone who asks Him for it and believes! I need it daily. And I’m grateful. Thanks for watching, Doris!

    Bonnie Wake
    Bonnie Wake
    October 17, 2018 10:50 am

    Thank you, Wally, for sharing this with us. It seems that in this age of social media it is easy for people to spread negative put downs more than positive uplifting words. Through it all we need to remember that we are God’s beloved children, His chosen and that pleasing Him should be our ultimate goal rather than pleasing others. ❤️

    Jessica
    Jessica
    October 17, 2018 10:27 pm

    I love what John Murphy says about descerning lies. Whether it is a lie being told to you by Satan in your mind or through someone else ask yourself if this is something that Jesus Christ, the man who died on the cross so that he would not have to be separated from me for eternity would say about me. If not, then it is a lie and all lies originate from Satan.

    Charlene Cook
    Charlene Cook
    October 18, 2018 7:10 am

    Wally, thank you for sharing! It takes a lot of courage to lay it all out there – the good and the not so good! But it helps all of us to see things in a different way, to understand, and learn compassion and love for others. I pray you will continue to do what God has called you to do and know He is walking alongside you all the way! Many blessings to you!

    sharmika
    sharmika
    October 19, 2018 8:37 am

    Wally GRACE GRACE !!! You are awesome!!

    Angela D Conner
    Angela D Conner
    November 2, 2018 5:56 pm

    Hearing those things really hurt me. I love you Wally, you have been such a blessing to me. Especially since coming to Birmingham and being away from my family. To add to this I no longer have my parents and the loss of them has been more hard on me then I imagined. Then I got married to someone whom I loved for a long time and everything was good. Then that started to change. Depression Sat in like never before. I felt like I was in a dark pit. You and Joy made me laugh. CJ, Becka, Hanson, you… Read more »

    jeanna sizemore
    jeanna sizemore
    November 3, 2018 10:59 pm

    Pray for those people.

    Mark Maddox
    Mark Maddox
    October 22, 2018 11:04 am

    Wally, I listen to your show every morning on my way to work. When your show first came on here in DFW area I was very resistant to it. You took away my most favorite radio program PowerFM. But eventually came around and started listening here and there because of my commitment I made to myself to uplift my spirit while traveling the car by listening to Christian music. It was my late brother and his son that got me into the Christian Rock music. My nephew was in a Christian rock band and I loved everything he did and… Read more »

    Andy Atencio
    Andy Atencio
    February 1, 2019 3:37 pm

    I think it is both telling and sad that Wally shares the most hurtful feedback he has ever received in his career has come since he started doing Christian radio. As someone who came to faith at midlife as a 25+ year Athiest, this is one of the issues I still struggle with when dealing with “Christians”. This idea that their faith somehow gives them a right to judge others in spite of the fact the Christ teaches exactly the opposite of that. The hypocrisy of this is completely missed by them, just like the hypocrisy of the Pharisees when… Read more »

    Vincent Ryan
    Vincent Ryan
    April 23, 2019 7:20 am

    This helped me today. Thank you

    BARBARA BUNTON
    BARBARA BUNTON
    May 9, 2019 8:59 am

    Love this website! Encouraging, and I love listening to videos each morning. Just curious, how do we get a Helpful Bible?

    Bree
    May 14, 2019 7:40 am

    I have been able to use this study on identity to help my high school children. They come across nasty comments daily, a majority on social media for all to see. But I have also reminded them that they, the “haters”, feel the need to lessen you because they don’t like themselves and see something great in you. Take pity, not offense. I’ve had the opportunity to also see a rectification of a friendship because of her non-retaliation and gentle response to those comments. It’s tough for these kids today because anything goes and the boundaries have all but disappeared.… Read more »

    Sandra
    Sandra
    May 22, 2019 11:16 am

    That garbage is bullets we need more than thick skin to fight bullets bullets can penetrate thick-skin Wally is so right. what we need is the armor of God. only armor can stop those bullets of Satan because that’s what this is. it’s demonic. it’s bullets aimed at our heart and mind to destroy us and our identity in God. I know where he’s coming from I’ve been told by Christians let I’m nasty I don’t fit. I’m poor. I don’t have any friends I’ll never fit my family won’t fit even my child I was told would not have… Read more »

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