Let me start this off by saying marriage is not the height of Christian living or the fulfillment of all things in this life. Single people – especially single people of God – you can still be happy and fulfilled without a spouse.
Now that that’s out there…
have you stopped dating because of the quarantine? Did your girlfriend move back home because classes got moved online? Are you sad because you can’t see the guy you were flirting with at work since you’ve gone remote? Don’t let that stop you!
Jennie Allen recently posted this on her Instagram:
Why now is a great moment to fall in love.…
We fell in love long distance, before face time, when a call out of state cost $1 a minute. We were too far to drive and too poor to fly.
We fell in love by talking. Lots of writing letters and talking. Zac got a job in college to pay the phone bill. We were not 100% sure this was “IT” but we wanted to keep getting to know each other, so we could know.
Real, intentional conversation is the lost art of our day. And this is a perfect moment to reclaim it. Netflix does not count as a date, asking great questions and time to listen to the answers does. So guys, set a time, call the girl or FaceTime her and plan an hour to get to know someone better. And friends keep on matchmaking.
May awkward digital first dates and second dates abound! I bet (if you try this) it might go better than you think!
Hey- You have the time.
This obviously isn’t the ideal scenario, but you can’t guarantee there’ll be a perfect moment. As someone who also married the man she dated long distance in the current digital age, here are some pros and cons:
On the down side
- You won’t get to observe them in some day to day environments until later.
- You can’t just sit with your special someone whenever you want.
- It’s a little more work if communication and trust aren’t your strong suits.
- You just miss them.
On the plus side
- We HAD to communicate – not 24/7, but when we did, it had to count.
- We HAD to trust each other.
- We HAD to make time together for it to work.
- We had a schedule so there wasn’t a temptation to ditch our friends.
- It was cost effective.
Overall, I wouldn’t trade it, and that’s why I’m here, along with Jenni, highly recommending the experience to you even for the next 4-8+ weeks. Long distance dating is free. It’s available. You’re available. So just reach out!
For us married peeps, let’s not go crazy and forward this blog to every single Jesus-lovin’ girl we’ve been praying for for the last 3 years. Instead, let’s include our single friends in our weekly calls to check in or meet for a social distancing activity. Then we can encourage them – if they bring it up – to be more intentional with the prospects they’ve been eyeing.
If you are single and thinking, “But, Edith – this is still nerve racking,” then you’re not alone.
Who isn’t nervous when dating?!
Rejection is inevitable, and this really seems like the least aggressive way to be declined. This isn’t the Love is Blind reality show. There’s no instant proposal awaiting you when the stay-at-home orders are lifted. And you have value even if they aren’t right for you. It’s possible to be content and be dating.
COVID-19 has put a lot of things on hold. But your life and your dating don’t have to be included.
Be intentional, and maybe your love story will begin in quarantine.